"You've been gone 17 days, and 17 long nights" (wrote ickle lickle Prince once upon a time) and that, I'm sorry to report, has indeed been the duration betwixt my postings. Perpetual infantile stewardship is depleting valuable resources and so I'm finding that I barely have the energy to depress the keys on this keyboard, let alone depress the keys in the correct order to produce mildly entertaining nonsense to boot. Is there anyone out there willing to jack right into my cerebral cortex and simply drain the essence of my musings into html format, with pics, for the blog so I can carry on sleeping whilst simultaneously remaining 'online' and "current"? No? . This brain needs coffee and crullers, stat!

Anyway, despite that pediatric preface, I refuse to turn this blog into a baby update noticeboard (you can use the My Coco link on the right for that :0), so let's have a pop at Steve Davis instead. For those few of you out there who didn't watch BBC2 on Sunday afternoons in the 1980's, Steve Davis used to be the world's number one snooker player. He was also, possibly unfairly, perceived to be an extremely straight and drab and boring ginger man. Now, it is customary in snooker, as in a lot of sports actually, for some of the more successful or prominent players to be given epithets relevant to their persona, attributes or playing style. Some of Steve's contempories at the time therefore were awarded somewhat flamboyant and exciting nick-names, such as Alex "Hurricane" Higgins and Jimmy "Whirlwind" White. Steve's nickname however was "Interesting". Steve "Interesting" Davis. Personally I felt that was a bit off and they could have at least stretched to something a bit more in the weather vein (excuse the pun), something comparable to Alex and Jimmy's nicknames and possibly also emanating from the Beaufort scale. Steve "Gentle Breeze" Davis maybe?

His eminence at snooker, dull personality and lack of "wind based" nickname therefore made it all the more confusing for me when I saw this advert:




Now I've checked Steve's Wikipedia entry and nowhere can I find anything that even remotely hints to him being any sort of authority on double-glazing (that would be Dennis Taylor with his over-sized glasses shurely? Ho ho). Why and how would any advertising company connect Steve Davis's snooker prowess with PVC windows, doors and conservatorys? I find the whole thing a bit suspect to be honest. A bit like a bodge job and cheap shot (trick shot? - Enough with the puns!! Ed) at pure attention grabbing advertising. What's also odd is the thumb thing he's doing. It doesn't look at all natural to me. Looks more like a picture that's been Photoshopped for an ulterior purpose. To help illustrate the point, here's my "artist's impression" of how the original would have looked, with the missing snooker cue re-instated:




Poor Steve isn't the first celebrity to fall foul of the develish photo editing application that is Photoshop and I doubt he'll be the last. It's the least we can do in the meantime though to boycott the despicable Network VEKA. Peace and love comrades.