Friday, June 26, 2009

R.I.P - M.J (1958 - 2009)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

"You've been gone 17 days, and 17 long nights" (wrote ickle lickle Prince once upon a time) and that, I'm sorry to report, has indeed been the duration betwixt my postings. Perpetual infantile stewardship is depleting valuable resources and so I'm finding that I barely have the energy to depress the keys on this keyboard, let alone depress the keys in the correct order to produce mildly entertaining nonsense to boot. Is there anyone out there willing to jack right into my cerebral cortex and simply drain the essence of my musings into html format, with pics, for the blog so I can carry on sleeping whilst simultaneously remaining 'online' and "current"? No? . This brain needs coffee and crullers, stat!

Anyway, despite that pediatric preface, I refuse to turn this blog into a baby update noticeboard (you can use the My Coco link on the right for that :0), so let's have a pop at Steve Davis instead. For those few of you out there who didn't watch BBC2 on Sunday afternoons in the 1980's, Steve Davis used to be the world's number one snooker player. He was also, possibly unfairly, perceived to be an extremely straight and drab and boring ginger man. Now, it is customary in snooker, as in a lot of sports actually, for some of the more successful or prominent players to be given epithets relevant to their persona, attributes or playing style. Some of Steve's contempories at the time therefore were awarded somewhat flamboyant and exciting nick-names, such as Alex "Hurricane" Higgins and Jimmy "Whirlwind" White. Steve's nickname however was "Interesting". Steve "Interesting" Davis. Personally I felt that was a bit off and they could have at least stretched to something a bit more in the weather vein (excuse the pun), something comparable to Alex and Jimmy's nicknames and possibly also emanating from the Beaufort scale. Steve "Gentle Breeze" Davis maybe?

His eminence at snooker, dull personality and lack of "wind based" nickname therefore made it all the more confusing for me when I saw this advert:

Now I've checked Steve's Wikipedia entry and nowhere can I find anything that even remotely hints to him being any sort of authority on double-glazing (that would be Dennis Taylor with his over-sized glasses shurely? Ho ho). Why and how would any advertising company connect Steve Davis's snooker prowess with PVC windows, doors and conservatorys? I find the whole thing a bit suspect to be honest. A bit like a bodge job and cheap shot (trick shot? - Enough with the puns!! Ed) at pure attention grabbing advertising. What's also odd is the thumb thing he's doing. It doesn't look at all natural to me. Looks more like a picture that's been Photoshopped for an ulterior purpose. To help illustrate the point, here's my "artist's impression" of how the original would have looked, with the missing snooker cue re-instated:

Poor Steve isn't the first celebrity to fall foul of the develish photo editing application that is Photoshop and I doubt he'll be the last. It's the least we can do in the meantime though to boycott the despicable Network VEKA. Peace and love comrades.

Sunday, June 07, 2009

And as if by magic, a baby arrived. Subtitled as, "At last, a valid use of the blog!".

So, here we have: Coco Brockbank-Gash, 7lb 4oz, born at 07:34, 07/06/09 at Wallingford Cottage Hospital.

Just two things to note:
  1. She is much happier in real life than is suggested by any of the photos I've taken so far
  2. Yes, we have unscrewed her hands to stop her from scratching herself

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Measured quietness reigning down from me at the moment. Even in the house we're speaking in hushed tones in case any overtly loud noise brings on the contractions early or some such malarkey - homunculus disgorgement is imminent...

To while away some of the time though I knocked up this piece of trash.

I purchased a homemade oil painting from eBay for the princely sum of 99p, and then proceeded to defile it with vintage (1983-86) transfers from He-Man, Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica and Knight Rider. It didn't actually turn out as well as I'd hoped - I think the term, "over egged the pudding" would be an accurate description of the result - but it's going to go into Toby's room anyway, and he likes it.

And finally, the fruit (literally) of our labours in the garden.

Not the sum total of course, just the stuff that's ready to eat now. I know what you're thinking, "you're going to have to freeze some of that over-harvest or it'll spoil". Pathetic isn't it? And I don't even like strawberries. All the other stuff in the veg patch is either over-watered, under-watered, partially gnawed by cats and\or pigeons or appears to be descended from some kind of rare breed dwarf variety that refuses to, or is genetically incapable of, growing beyond the stage it was at when we planted it....4 weeks ago. More "gardening sucks a massive wiener" stories at a later date pop pickers...
are you watching me........?